Am... looks like I've left this shit again....
uuummm....
God.., God...
Love You loads!
Don't worry about him!
And, ummm.
Biggest biggest kisses...
And biggest biggest hugs...

 How old are you? Do YOU know where are you gonna be in a year ? in ten years ? in a week ? Where ? How are you gonna look, who's gonna be with you ? Do you know? Are you sure? ARE YOU SURE?! Look around you, look upon the Internet, look outside, communicate. So many fools, yes? Don't be one of them. But shhhh, don't be one of them but at the same time don't tell them a thing and don't show it off. They're gonna think you're as dumb as they are and then you can just secretly outscore and beat them in anything. And I am beating and I've beaten everyone I know. But I made a mistake pointing some things out and promising that I'm gonna do it, do better then you, they all. Stay tall and strong. If you're about to fall, don't look for a cover. Stand the fuck up, stand your ground and don't give your fat ass up, because nobody can beat and hurt you. It's also easier if someone is with you. It can help, maybe not even literally being with you, by It's existence. The tragedy of life is living to live better. It's not that bad as long as It doesn't take too, way too long. Wanna live in your dream ? What dream? How does it look like ? Take a fucking pen or fucking buy it, your fuckup and write it down, what must you do to achieve it all, huh ? Now stop that fucking writing, you stupid fuck and get your fucking super fat ass up the fucking chair or whatever and GO, DO IT. That's how things are done in life. Dummies stop at the writing part, or mostly - they don't even buy the pen. But remember - Shh. Life is like a game, but you have no respawns, you have one damn chance and you are in the middle of it right now, and what have you achieved ? Or don't tell me It's all just waiting in the future? Lies.

Stand Your ground.

Making other happy. Dying yourself deep inside. Can You even make me happy ? You can't always live with a thought "It's gonna be better", why not now ?

May be able to think I hate everyone or everything. I Summed all the shit up and managed to know myself well enough to know that all I hate is idiots. An idiot : inside, outside, his behavior, speech, moves, smell, looks, ideas, everyday, history, future plans and if you pay enough details also facebook page, friends. I saw a picture of a guy buying ~50 roses for his gf (knows her for about 2 weeks, the most common specie of an idiot) on a Valentines. Made me feel weird. Year after year I tried to know myself to know what is this feeling I get when I see stuff like that. Am I jealous? Mad ? Sad ? What is it ? It's not being jealous at all but I still can't describe it properly. Why do I get this feeling ? First of all, talking about this particular situation, what day is it today ? 17th. That dude unfriended her on FB and has no more "same stuff"with her. Easy to think of what happened. Secondly, I know how much does all that shit, I mean flowers cost. He had to spent about 100 EUR forfuckingsure. Where from ? I know him well enough to know he has no money, no job and never had, nothing. All he does is just drinking outside everyday buttt, here comes his mommy. It's his moms cash he buys shitloads of flowers and beers everyday. Posting it on facebook to try to look cool and sure he is popular. Jealous ? Not at all. That's not him. He is a damn abandoned shadow just floating around like a steam. Pure nothing. Think about yourself, yes, you. What would you do if all of your family members, friends, gf/bf would simply die, right fucking now leaving you a place, simple flat to live at and cash to live through ~two months. What would YOU do ? How would it all look ? Are you a person and human enough yourself ? How would it feel to be alone ? Could you live ? I think the reason of me hating them idiots like the guy I described is that I had to live even worse since I was a lil twatty kid, without absolutely nothing just myself. And I managed not even telling what I had to go through to get to the point where I am now. I hate winters. So good that this winter is kind of a brake from shit and just life in general, the best relaxation I've ever had, so feeling sugoi enough atm. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wrUgmJQ-cms And I don't get it why does my post looks good now, like I want it to be seen and when I publish It, it looks like one big pile of shit ? Well whatever I guess, someday I'm gonna have to re-do, re-style it somehow. Not the main issue atm anyway ! The world is full of idiots, somebody has to point it out to them or they will never know. And mostly you can't fix idiots but you can unsubscribe from their updates. And stop, stop telling people "How dumb can you be?" because mostly they take it as a challenge.

I wanna be with them who wants to and makes me happy.

I should have more than I have now. Pathetic.